Rise and Shine: An awakening.

I have came to terms that I am the beneficiary of many types of privilege, and the main impediment I have was how to articulate this for myself, and, if there were those who are curious about my journey of enlightenment, how to share this with others without sounding like I am pointing fingers and making others purposefully feel guilt or shame about the topic.  This is a personal discovery on my part.  The revelations are my own, and they are shaped by external elements and events, and how my awareness of privilege effects and is effected by them. 

​What this blog is:

This blog will be a collection of essays about how I have come to terms with my numerous privileges, and the effect my privilege has on those who do not share those same benefits.  In the past, whenever I had been confronted by privilege, and the gains from it, my initial response was to get defensive about it, and point my fingers at others, in an attempt to divert the subject away from me, and back on those who were leveling the accusations.  I now realize just how foolhardy this is.  As I practice the Four Agreements revealed by Don Miguel Ruiz in his book of the same title, the agreement Don't Take Anything Personally immediately comes to mind, and the minute I practice this agreement, I can do what I believe is the most important part of the awareness of privilege, and that is to listen.


Listening, in my opinion, is the main way to allow those who feel victimized by privilege to voice their opinions on a particular subject, and to let them know that I am hearing their viewpoints, without taking offense.


For example, let's take the topic of Male Privilege.  In the infancy of the #MeToo movement, I clumsily barged my way into the subject, because I felt I had a personal narrative that would allow me to help promote the cause.  My personal story, in retrospect, minimized the movement in it's essence, because it was about women coming forward and telling their stories.  I was vilified, in retrospect rightfully so, because not only did I get defensive when complaints were leveled at me, but as the can of worms was opened and emotions got high, I lashed out at my tormentors.


Now, how should I have reacted?  And how should I react now and in the future?  Simply, at first, by listening.  Then by making myself aware that the focus should have been on those who were victims, without inserting a personal narrative which had, in essence, very little to do with the subject as a whole.  So, regarding that incident, I allowed my emotions and feelings to overcloud my judgement, in the attempt to insert my personal story into the narrative (which in retrospect, wasn't nearly as important to the #MeToo movement, owing to the fact that I was able to resolve my issues, due primarily to privilege, male privilege.)  I also unfriended those who lashed out at me, rather than trying to understand where they were coming from.  I have since attempted to friend them again, admitting to the lack of sensitivity on my part.  I will be also be sending them links to this blog, so that they can see how I hope to address the subject of privilege in the future.  I see many public figures who are accused of male privilege, be it in the form of sexual misconduct or harassment, and now I cringe when they get defensive about their actions, or joking the subject away, rather than having the first reaction be one of awareness and, even if their actions are of the most honorable intention in their eyes, a sense of shame that their actions were such that they could be misinterpreted.


The hardest part of dealing with privilege is admitting that those who are leveling the accusation, to varying degrees, are right!  Doing this without getting defensive is really, really hard!  But as I come to terms with how I benefit from privilege in many forms, I find it easier to admit, and actually find it rather satisfying to proclaim how I am addressing it.


A big mistake I made with my initial resolution of benefitting from privilege, was the idea that I should do my part to "reach a hand down and lift them up to my pedestal that they were putting me on."  This statement, in retrospect, is terribly arrogant (Thankfully, I never made it in public, but I did believe it for a time.)  The way, I believe, to combat privilege in it's many forms is to find a way to step down from my lofty perch, and give a voice or promote a cause, without reward, that would allow others to be lifted up.  That is, in a small sense, and as a start to my road of awareness, what this blog is for.


I'm open to critiques, ideas and suggestions to aid me in articulating this very important topic.  Fire away!


Chipperdee.